My Official Unofficial Guide to Happy Friendships

What time is it? Summertime! YAY!

We’re almost a month into summer, and I’ve already gone camping and have had tons of fun. I’ve done a lot of writing, piano practice, guitar practice, reading, watching movies, and spending time with family. Next on the agenda for us is a Wizard of Oz theatre camp next week (crossing my fingers I get the part of Dorothy or one of the Witches!) and the week after that, I get to go to a youth camp in San Antonio (yay!)

Lots of exciting things. Drop me a comment below with what plans you have. I’d love to see what shenanigans you guys are up to.

Moving, onnnnn… before our camp a couple weeks ago, and after, I’ve been analyzing my relationships. My family relationships, my relationship with myself, but most of all, I’ve been looking at my friendships. In the past couple years I’ve had to do some raking through the pile to say the least and really look at what people I need to hold on to, and which friends are toxic, manipulative, or unempowering.

There’s a saying that it’s better to have a few true friends than hundreds of friends that are fake. It is hard to find genuine friendships that uplift you, and are healthy relationships, but it is worth it to keep sifting through and looking for them.

I can count the number of people I consider “real friends” on one hand. I have many other friends, or friend-acquaintances as I like to call them, but the people who are truly there for me, who understand me and love me for my personality and who I am are the ones that truly matter.

My official unofficial guide to happy friendships

Two of the people on this list are my mom and my sister, Elyssa. They know everything about me and put up with my craziness every day. Yet they show me love, listen to me, and support me. I am overwhelmingly grateful for the true-blue friends I have in my life.

I want to take a moment to list out a few qualities that are essential to having happy friendships, making and keeping friends, and how to spot when a relationship is not working for you. When it comes down to it, there are 5 attributes that sum up what being a friend is: Loyalty, Trust, Honesty, Support, and Unconditional Love.

  1. Loyalty: This word is usually associated with allegiance -you want to know that your friend will stand up for you, and they will have your back. They will stand by you in the good and the bad, and they will make sure they are helping you.
  2. Trust: If you don’t trust someone, it can be hard to develop a deep relationship with them. The friend you have who you share your secrets, hopes, and dreams with and who shares those with you too is indeed a true friend. One of the biggest breaks in trust (especially among girls) is gossip
  3. Honesty: I also think of this as good communication. Misunderstandings and assumptions make for the nastiest friendship break-ups. Make sure you say what you mean and mean what you say. It’s better to admit you did wrong than to cover it up and act like nothing happened. Friends will tell each other the truth, even if it hurts. 
  4. Support: I believe this is one of the most important ones. A friend supports your dreams and passions. They will show up and cheer you on, even when you don’t feel like it. I have a friend who really supports me in my writing and public speaking and music – they encourage me and help me see the things I do well. A friend empowers you and lifts you up.
  5. Unconditional Love: This one is no easy feat. To be a friend is to see the other person for who they are – a beautiful individual. We all have faults and mistakes, but a friend can be honest while gentle and loving you for who you are. 

When it comes down to it, to have good friends, you need to be a great friend! You attract what you put out there and what goes around comes around.

To have good friends, you need to be a great friend

I hope that as you go through the summer, you’re able to make some wonderful friendships and decide which ones are good for you. Friends are the bright flowers in the garden of life, the rainbows in the storms, and the surprises on gloomy days. I can’t tell you how incredible it feels to have someone to laugh with, talk to, and share life memories with.

Who is your best friend? What makes them your best friend? Share below in the comments!

Be confident!

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